When you have countrywide dating options right in front of your eyes, complete with distance apart and likes, hobbies, choices of books and movies , it can be hard to decide who’s worth your attention and who really is not compatible.
In a world of choice in everything from breakfast cereal to cheese and several brands of gin it is not surprising that choosing a forty plus daters online can seem like a challenge.
Wasn’t it easier in the past or are we being too critical.?
Before the proliferation and acceptance of online forty plus dating the chances are you’d go out with and even marry a forty plus dater from your hometown and sometimes even a nearby street. Alternatively someone you meet at college or university. Even an introduction from well meaning friends.
If you found someone you really like it would be foolish to risk loosing them as the chances of meeting someone who meant as much would be unlikely.
However with so much choice literally at our fingertips the choices become much harder because of the opportunity of meeting and communicating with so many forty plus daters.
The so called endless array of options in today’s online dating world, and it becomes increasingly hard to justify picking one person and committing to trying a long-term relationship.
Where’s the spark? Looking at a phone screen or laptop it is hard to relate to an actual person. It is not helped by the focus on TV shows like `Love Island’ which focus on quick and short term relationships and intimacy.
Dating has become less about the magic of an unexpected encounter that leads to love and more about an assembly line approach to relationships.
Is real connection possible when you are online dating?
Absolutely. When you connect with someone online then you need to get off the site and meet for a first date . Commit to doing things you love and being open to doing things that the other person also enjoys.
Be clear with yourself about what you really want in a partner and you’re more likely to meet someone special, who shares your values, personality traits and outlook.
Sarah Hussey xx