Dating can be a challenge for many forty plus daters who are starting out on the look out for a relationship.
Feelings of hurt, confusion, frustration, hopelessness, boredom, and exhaustion can come with the online dating scene, but also excitement, hope and optimism and the tingle of romance.
So what’s the thing about dating that bothers you most? and also the thing about forty plus dating that keeps you going on with the search for a forty plus relationship.
What are biggest dating challenges for forty plus women online. I have been told it is because they feel there are no quality men online. That sure would make things difficult. If it was true that is!
There are millions of single men over the age of forty using online dating!
And remember you only need one so the chances of you meeting a quality man is pretty good and if you forty plus men are also moaning about the lack of quality women then you will also be please to know that millions of forty plus dating women use online dating.
If you live anywhere near a populated area, and are looking for a forty plus date who is attractive, well educated and independent then you are bound to find someone on online dating.
You cannot hold onto this false myth as that just gives you an excuse to not meet a quality forty plus dater. You have to take responsibility for your own attitude and your own dating profile.
The false and negative perception gives you permission to stay the same and stay single.
You are merely a victim of false belief rather than a strong, smart forty plus dater in charge of your social dating life. Some points to remember when you are doing your picking.
You are now a forty plus grown up so you need grown up qualities. These are the qualities that are going to make you happy.
Be willing to forgo the idea of perfection and find a real forty plus person, with quirks as we all have them. You need to establish what quirks you will enjoy and appreciate.
Be honest with yourself by getting to the core of your belief system and how that affects your attitude to meeting forty plus daters. Does your negative attitude alter your actions or lack of action and does that change your dating outcomes.
You need to have a positive attitude to have a positive dating experience. Give forty plus daters a chance.
Quickly dismissing a forty plus dater within minutes of meeting is most often about self-protection and reliving past experiences in the present than a true reflection of the dater. it is impossible to get to know someone within a few minutes and even the first date dismissal is suspect.
Write your list of values, and behaviours that you find attractive and desirable and that you expect in a forty plus date with whom you intend to spend time. Are these qualities realistic and are they deal breakers and would they be red flags if they weren’t there. From this list you will begin to refine your must-have’s, nice to have’s and who cares and even what was I thinking ?.
To have some fun with a forty plus date, letting go of the idea that there are no good single daters for you is a first critical step in your new quest to find dating success.
Sarah Hussey xx